Tag: Season 1

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Never say die!

If I remember correctly, February 2nd commemorates the 5th anniversary of me flying home to revel in my failure of being one of the four remaining Beauty and the Geek participants in the mansion. Okay, technically, there wasn’t much revelry—even if Scarlet and I had won the $250K, we wouldn’t be allowed to revel in our victory lest the producers take the money away and slap us with a big, nasty lawsuit. I wouldn’t think that going from victorious to penniless would inspire any festivities, but that’s just me.

The thing I’ll remember most about that day isn’t waking up in a hotel bed instead of my room in the mansion. It isn’t eating normal food instead of brand-name food with duct tape covering up the brand names. It isn’t even passing out on the airplane before the stewardess could tell me how to buckle my seat belt for the flight home. Nope, the thing I’ll remember most is getting off the plane. Continue reading “Never say die!”

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PTRSD

I’ve taken some time the last few days to watch the first season of Beauty and the Geek again since my mother purchased it on amazon.com. It’s been slightly reedited—they added about two minutes of extra footage per episode—but I’m not sure if that warrants the price tag of $1.99 each or $11.14 for the season. (That’s my opinion, but if you’re a rabid fan… keep your foamy mouth to yourself.)

So I was going through, seeing how they added a few seconds here and there. For example, when I got to Episode 4 and they were showing us trying to get phone numbers, it revealed that my full quote was not “OOOHHHHHHH…”. It was “OOOHHHHHH, I got snubbed!” That’s how illuminating the new edit was at times.

But much like previous viewings, each time I watch myself wandering through that outdoor mall, thinking about the horrors of approaching random women and interrupting their routines to get the phone numbers for no reason… it still makes me cringe. Giving Caitilin a really bad massage? “Oops.” Throwing up on TV? “Man, that sucked.” Trying to get digits? It hurts to think about. Seriously.

I came up with the answer while chatting with someone online the next night. We’d turned our webcams on so we could see each other and every time I looked at my face on the screen, copying my every movement, every expression, everything that flashed across my face… it had an unreal quality to it. Then I had a flashback to watching myself on TV and it finally clicked.

I was suffering from PTRSD: Post-traumatic reality show disorder.

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So, um, would you, like, have dinner with me?

It just occurred to me that things could have gone horribly awry during Episode 4. Each of the guys was supposed to ask one of the girls (who was not our partner) out for a “romantic dinner” that night. So here’s the deal: Chuck asked Scarlet, Bill asked Caitilin, I asked Mindi and Richard asked Lauren. If, say, I had asked Lauren to dinner instead, then the only girl remaining for Richard would have been his partner, Mindi. Then what? Would the producers have stepped in and told me, “Tough shit, you’re eating with Mindi tonight”? I’m truly curious about this…

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Validated or downright icky?

Those are the two feelings sloshing back and forth inside my head tonight. It started with a voice mail message from a friend in Orlando: she was watching MTV and saw a shot of Scarlet and me sitting on a bed. Huh?! Like from Beauty and the Geek?! Upon arriving home this afternoon, I checked my e-mail and found a message from Cher (from Season 2)—she forwarded a PDF file that was five pages long. In the San Fernando TV Guide, there are two MTV channels that had 90 listings for Beauty and the Geek. That’s right, 90.

I haven’t the slightest idea which episodes of which season are playing at what time, given that the regular episodes are listed as “Beauty and the Geek, ” but they’ve also scattered the Casting Special 10 times and The Aftermath 12 times throughout the mix. Regardless, it’s playing at various times between today (the 19th) through Dec. 1st. For some reason, my Myspace page became really popular this afternoon.

So you may be asking yourself, “Why isn’t he jumping up and down with glee, giddy because he’s regained his B (or C or D)-level celebrity status?” Well, for one thing, I’m sitting in bed while writing this on my laptop and it’s very difficult to jump up and down while resting on my butt and typing. (Don’t think I haven’t tried…) For another thing, it’s on MTV. I could handle being associated with Smallville and Gilmore Girls, but now the show is gonna get lumped in with reality TV garbage like The Real World! THE REAL WORLD!!!

Yeah, MTV has a much larger fan base than the WB (“the CW,” now that they merged with UPN), so many, many more younger people who fit the show’s target audience will bother to watch it. Also, even thought it’s on cable, it’s not buried in the abyss known as the crappy UHF stations! Yay! But… but… THE REAL WORLD!!! So now I’m torn about how to feel. Yay for expanding further into the mainstream media, but… but… well, you get the idea.

(Incidentally, I wonder how MTV got the rights to the show. The first season started last June, so it’s been on the air for less than a year and a half. Did the WB lose the contract when it merged with UPN? Did they sell the rights for a couple bucks and a box of Cracker Jacks? Did Ashton Kutcher blackmail the CEO of the WB because the dude slept with Demi Moore? How did he manage to pack up his Beautiful and Geeky bags and move elsewhere? Well, however it happened, that’s not my primary concern: I’m busy waiting for the DVDs for Season 1 to hit stores nation-wide. Now that will garner some activity on my Myspace page…)