Tag: Facebook status messages

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You think you’re so special?

That thought (among others) has been rolling around in my head since I got the email from WordPress.com about Facebook not allowing Publicize to automatically share blog entries on my profile anymore. That, plus a handful of videos on YouTube talking about the effects that social media can have on the brain. So it’s really been a question of why I want to put my writing on Facebook at all.

I mean, I posted a picture of Teresa’s engagement ring in part to show everyone we were engaged. But I also kept going back to Facebook to look at the picture and see how the number of likes and loves and all of the other reactions continued to climb. So Teresa and I were engaged and I felt… important? Popular? Special?

But when it comes to blog entries, that part isn’t really there. It’s not like I’m publishing a book or achieving some other impressive goal. This is just me writing and the only “like” I need is mine.

Of course, I could look at an even broader picture and ask why I’m publishing anything online in the first place. I can get my own approval if I’m writing something by hand or typing it on my laptop and never sharing it. So why? Do I crave acceptance that badly? Do I need people’s attention and approval that much? What makes me so special?

I guess part of it is that, yes, I do enjoy a bit of the spotlight. I like to see people’s reactions when I create something. It’s the same reason why I enjoy community theater: I get to enjoy being part of the cast of a show, make something come alive on stage that was originally just words on paper and I get to entertain people. I get to hear them laugh and gasp and applaud. And that happens because of me.

If you’re reading this, I doubt you’re having any of those three reactions. (If you’re applauding, you may have some explaining to do to the other people in the library…) But maybe you’re interested. Maybe you’re smiling. Maybe… just maybe… you’re entertained. And I guess that’s the other part of it.

It’s not just “I’m so special.” It’s “Everyone who’s reading this is so special—All three of them!—and I’d like to make their day a little brighter. A little greater. A little more special.” I could easily hoard all of my writing to myself, keep it tucked away so no one else could ever read it. Finish a story, essay, journal entry, blog post, look over it once or twice more for mistakes or typos, then throw it into the fire where no human eyes will ever see it again. Or just delete it if I wrote it on my laptop—throwing my laptop into the fire seems a bit extreme.

So I’m doing this for you, faithful readers! Because you’re so special! … Okay, it’s partly for me, too, but mostly for you, amirite? No? Drat…

When this popped into my head yesterday, I was thinking about writing gratitudes on Facebook instead of just my blog. I mean, Facebook is where it all started. There was a “gratitude challenge” going around where you were supposed to write down three things that made you feel grateful for five days. Oh, and you were supposed to tag three of your friends each day to get them to be more grateful, too. I was… someone’s second day, I think, so it’s nice to know I wasn’t an afterthought.

And so I did the challenge. Half of the challenge. I wrote three gratitudes a day, but never tagged anyone. I guess it was partly because I didn’t want to be a nuisance and partly because I didn’t want anyone to be an afterthought. Or forget someone altogether. That’d be an embarrassment, not a gratitude.

Then after those first five days… I kept going. For a month. 33 days with just one on the last day. 100 gratitudes. (Technically, I think it was only 99: I was grateful for pizza two days in a row. Because pizza.) And it felt good. I felt grateful, maybe other people felt grateful… the Facebook status messages were getting some likes, so I guess some people were entertained, too.

So that was part of the drive that kept me going for so long the last time and thus part of the reason I’m copying and pasting gratitudes from my blog to Facebook now: other people. It wasn’t just “Hey, I’m keeping them entertained!” It was also “Hey, they’re expecting another one today!” They provided a sense of accountability. Even if I felt a little tired or the clock was approaching midnight, I couldn’t just miss a day… the gratitudes were primarily for me, but knowing that other people were reading them was a reason to keep going. And feeling even more grateful about my life and the blessings I’ve been given. And pizza. Because pizza.

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Kick reposting’s ass!

I hold a great deal of respect for cancer patients, victims, survivors, etc., which is why I wrote the “Kick cancer’s ass!” blog post.

However, I’m tired of all the “Look at me, I’m supporting an important cause!” status messages, so I’m fighting back! If you feel the need to use this status message, go for it. I’ll give you a pass this time—it won’t soil your reputation in my eyes and I won’t think you’re a complete loser. This time…

“Today is ‘Don’t Repost This Status’ Day. This status is meant to honor those people who don’t repost it, but for the 3% who do, you should know that reposting a status message is an empty gesture that doesn’t actually accomplish anything. If you repost this for at least an hour, I will laugh at you to your face.”

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Do more than just kick cancer’s ass!

A friend of mine who had breast cancer read another “kick cancer’s ass” status message and got as annoyed as I do, probably more so since she’s a survivor. She wrote a comment about how cancer patients may have that wish, but it’s not the only one and it might not be at top of the wish list.

The person challenged my friend to write a “corrected” version to post in its place, so I decided to give it a shot. Here’s what I came up with (and by all means, feel free to correct this one):

All of us have a thousand wishes. To be thinner, to be bigger, have more money, have a cool car, a day off, a new phone, etc. A cancer patient has one additional wish: to live with cancer. They may wish to be cured, but they do not limit themselves to merely “kicking cancer’s ass”. They know that every moment is special and wish to live as well as they can. Whether you repost this or not is unimportant. Instead, to honor someone who died, is fighting cancer or even had cancer, remember them and how they have touched your lives.

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Kick cancer’s ass!

It happened again. I read someone’s status message on Facebook that talked about people having a thousand wishes.

All of us have a thousand wishes. To be thinner, to be bigger, have more money, have a cool car, a day off, a new phone, etc. A cancer patient only has one wish, to kick cancer’s ass. I know that 97% of you won’t post this as your status, but my friends will be the 3% that do. In honor of someone who died, is fighting cancer or even had cancer, post this for at least one hour.

I wrote a snarky comment about someone I know who has cancer—he has a second wish, which is to get rid of a bunch of squirrels that have invaded an apartment building’s walls. Honestly, though, this version of “one wish” bothers me a lot more than the military wishing to come home, probably because it’s more personal.

I know a lot of people who have cancer, have survived cancer, have died from cancer and I’m sure a lot of people I know now will develop cancer. (Sad, but probably true.) One thing I can absolutely guarantee: they have not all narrowed their lives down to the single wish of kicking cancer’s ass.

Surgery is rough. Radiation is tough. Chemotherapy suuuuucks. That’s what I’m assuming—I know it doesn’t sound pleasant. But between cancer treatments, you know what those people do? They don’t just sit at home and wish their cancer would go away. No, they leave the hospital and they live. I imagine they appreciate life more than most of us because they’ve been given a clock, a stopwatch, a fuse that says, “You’ve got a limited amount of time left.” They can be cured or go into remission—they can kick cancer’s ass—but if that wish isn’t granted, the clock is ticking.

But to quote Monty Python, “I’m not dead yet!” The clock hasn’t stopped ticking. They still have opportunities to go out and enjoy life. They still have time to make wishes, achieve them, make more wishes, achieve them (things like growing hair during chemo and radiation may be out of their reach) and the cycle continues until they die. The same thing goes for all of us, really. We can have the same wishes and dreams—we just don’t have the same predetermined finish line.

So if any of you reading this are cancer sufferers, cancer survivors or cancer casualties (if it’s the last one, you probably have some explaining to do), I wish you the best. I hope you can kick cancer’s ass. I also hope you’ve made many more wishes that can be granted while you’re doing it. (Even people with cancer can multitask, right?)

And to quote something that’s not from Monty Python, here’s a message from The Daily Show: “**** You, Cancer.”