Tag: fan encounter

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Beauty and the Geek psych evaluation

Last week, I got a message on here and on Facebook from a high school student in New York. The full story (that she explained in full a little later) was that her psychology teacher had seen Beauty and the Geek, assigned groups of kids in his class to watch different seasons, then gave them a few options for an assignment after that.

One of those options was to interview a former cast member, so because her group liked me the best (Yay!), they found a way to contact me, we sent a few messages back and forth and I eventually had an hour-long chat via Skype with three high school psychology students. They sent me a list of questions ahead of time, giving me time to think about my answers, so I got to tell them a couple of good stories and I like to think I dropped a couple of interesting knowledge bombs, too.

Some were basic questions that I might get from anyone: Why did you audition for the show, how has it affected your personal life, what would you have done with the money, etc. One question I liked that had an answer they probably didn’t expect was #7 on the list:

Some individuals may feel that receiving the money as an award corrupts the experience. Do you agree with this? In other words, are you glad that you didn’t win?

“No.”

Aside from the obvious “I would have liked to win”, I don’t think it corrupts the experience. It may affect how you approach it: you may be there for the experience or you may be focused entirely on winning the money, but either way, your goal is set, you know what you’re trying to accomplish. If everyone is there solely for the experience and the money is introduced a few weeks in, that could corrupt it. People’s behavior could change because their goal changes. (I suppose “corrupt” is a personal judgment—you consider money a negative factor—but it definitely alters the experience, for better or worse.)

I also liked the final question, #10:

What was going through your head when you found out that high school students wanted to interview you about a show you did 10 years ago?

Initially, I was flattered. “They like me, they really like me!” Then I was extremely curious. “What was the process that went from ‘high school psychology class’ to them contacting me about a potential interview? What kind of terrible teacher would force their students to watch that show?!” (Plus there was the little voice in my head reminding me, “I’m over 20 years older than these kids… God, I’m old.”)

It was really nice that they’d seen all the episodes recently, so I could tell them stories relating to their questions and they knew exactly what I was referring to (the quotes below are approximate, but you get the idea):

  • [One question on the students’ list was about whether I’m still into the same activities that I was ten years ago.] “Remember when someone mentioned ‘going out only two times a month’? That was me.”
  • “We were allowed to tell girls anything but the truth about why we wanted their phone numbers, so Chuck was the smartest out of all of us because he came up with the best lie!”
  • “I let Scarlet yell at me after the outdoor challenge for a long time because I agreed with her. I knew I screwed up.” [I proceeded to give them a list of things I could/should have done differently.]
  • “During the Aftermath, the producers were giving people some of those questions. The girl who asked Joe on a date was 14 years old.” [Joe called her afterward and got to talk to her dad.]
  • “They didn’t show all of the questions because someone asked me about how the Boy Scouts responded after my ‘meltdown’ during the outdoor challenge. I think they specifically worded the questions to see what kind of emotional responses they could get.”

Finally, toward the end of the interview, one girl asked me for five adjectives that best describe the experience for me and there’s no question that “memorable” belongs on that list.

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Looks aren’t everything

Recently, I’ve been thinking back to an encounter I had at an Oktoberfest last year. Someone walked up to me and asked if I was on a show with beauties and “smart guys.” Very smooth… But she was merely a scout, chosen in large part because of the large rock on her finger that showed both that she was married and that you wouldn’t want to get in the way of her left cross.

After establishing my identity as a cast member on Beauty and the Geek, she walked back to her group of friends, at which point one of them came running out and yelled, “You were my favorite!” She then leapt into my arms and gave me a huge hug which would have been much less awkward if my girlfriend hadn’t been standing five feet away when it happened.

We talked for a while and she told me that she used to be a size 1, but… well, she wasn’t big, but she wasn’t a size 1 anymore. I don’t remember her story—it’s been almost a year since this happened—but when explaining the situation, she wasn’t concerned about having lost her petite figure: “I just don’t give a shit.” Continue reading “Looks aren’t everything”

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Salesmanship at its finest

About two weeks ago, I was meeting my mother at T.G.I. Friday’s for dinner and met Steve, someone who recognized me from Beauty and the Geek. Well, initially, he recognized me, but he couldn’t remember from where. He asked if he’d seen me earlier in the week, where I worked—I told him about the bar exam—but he looked stumped.

“Could it have been further back?”
“Yeah…”
“How often do you watch TV?”

His eyes lit up immediately. Apparently, he and his wife watched the last four episodes, he thought I did a great job, etc. Before I went inside, he gave me his card, which had a website listed on the back. He said I should take a look, used my first name as a “password,” got my phone number and that was it.

Before people start freaking out, it was a one-time offer, one that I’m not sure why I accepted in the first place. Still, he got my number, I checked out the site that night and realized it wasn’t the first time I’d seen it. Hoeft Enterprises sells a bunch of random products, one being XS, a drink that has no sugar, no carbs, gives you an energy boost, causes immaculate conception—the whole nine yards. I recognized the site because it was something being passed around on the set of Fall Into Me (that indie film where I helped out as an extra during an overnight shoot). Matthew Feeney has one for breakfast, one for lunch, then a sensible dinner, then kills a cow with his bare hands and eats it because he has so much energy. …Okay, maybe not, but he really likes the stuff.

Steve called me shortly thereafter and we set up a meeting for this evening. I agreed to go even though I was pretty sure I knew what was going to happen. I’d already decided I didn’t want to get into direct sales for any reason—I’d turned down a similar offer shortly after graduating from college and ended up getting into an e-mail flame war with the person who set up the meeting. (The employment ad they published said nothing about sales and the company name was different as well, but I stuck around ‘cause I had nothing better to do that afternoon.) Still, I said I would, so I met up with him a couple hours ago.

I’m trying to imagine just how frustrated he might have been afterwards, because the only thing he got out of me was a willingness to listen to a CD he lent me (and that was after I suggested that if he wanted me to, I would). Beyond that, anytime he made a suggestion to help me “see the light” about the scheme he was presenting… nothing doing.

I’m not gonna go into any details about how “direct business” works or whatever the hell it was called—it’s more fun to think about the tactics he was using to try and convince me that “all the money I could make would be totally awesome, man!” Not in those terms, of course, but that was the general premise. Should any of you end up cornered by one of these people and don’t want to kill him, take notes about what happened to me. And carry a pen-knife just in case.

He started out by trying to become my friend. There’s nothing wrong with that, of course; any person you’re having a conversation with will want to get to know you better. However, when he starts asking about your dreams and what you want to do with your life within the first half hour… that’s not just because he wants to be your buddy.

What was kinda funny was that I couldn’t think of any major things I want to accomplish with my life. I never planned on being on national TV, but it happened nonetheless. I’ll be happy to live a normal life with normal friends and a normal family—if nothing spectacular happens, I’ll be content.

Since that didn’t work, he pulled out a palm pilot and showed me a list of goals he wants to achieve. I want to repeat that: he pulled out a palm pilot and showed me a list of goals he wants to achieve. I don’t see anything wrong with keeping the list, but keeping the list with him at all times?! Anyway, some of them were pretty impressive: fly in an F-16 and build a three-hole golf course in his backyard. Others involved helping his mother and wife retire soon. What amused me the most about that was a chart regarding old people in the workforce: a certain percentage work into their 70s, some are dependant on their family, 2% are financially independent… and he wants to help his mother retire. Hmmm…

Another thing I noticed was his body language (or sometimes the lack thereof). He was leaning forward on a regular basis, especially when trying to express his excitement about the program and how it can help people get loads o’ cash. Had I been leaning forward at the same time, it probably would have looked like I was excited as well, so I made sure to sit upright and oftentimes have my arm hanging off the back of my chair. If I was getting passionate about the subject, I wouldn’t be moving away from it, would I?

Then I pushed a button to see what would happen. According to the diagram, the sponsor gets a certain percentage of what the seller earns; if there’s a second seller, the first gets the same percentage, but has to give up part of it to the original sponsor. He admitted that was the case, so I said it reminded me of a pyramid scheme.

“That offends me very much.”

That’s what he said, but his facial expression never changed. No frown, no squint, no creases in his forehead or tensing of his muscles, no sputtering or cursing… nothing. I’m not even sure if the tone of his voice changed—he just said, “That offends me very much.”

For those who’ve never heard of pyramid schemes, you get a list of ten names—you mail a dollar to the person on top, delete his name, add yours to the bottom and you eventually get one dollar from a bajillion people once you finally get to the top of the list. However, pyramid schemes are highly illegal. I got a couple during my first year of law school and ended up contacting the Attorney General about it. I never heard back, but I did what I was supposed to.

That story smoothed the waters over and he was okay again (assuming he wasn’t okay after I said it). I apologized for the comparison, but it was insincere. For the most part, I didn’t care about being there. At one point, he asked me why I showed up. I responded honestly, “Because you asked me to.” I really didn’t have much interest in what he had to say—I was also kinda pissed that Caribou Coffee sells bottles of Sprite for $1.75—but I showed up. He appreciated my honesty, though I imagine he wasn’t exactly thrilled that I wasn’t there for the cash cow he was presenting.

That was pretty much it. He let me keep the fliers and asked me to listen to the CD, though he “needs” to get it back, so he’ll be calling me again on Wednesday. We went our separate ways and I noticed that the car he got into wasn’t particularly stylish. (Apparently, he got the list a little while ago and just added his name to the bottom.)

Will I cave? No. I don’t have much interest in getting involved in sales, regardless of whether I can earn upwards of $100,000 while working five hours a week. It was hard enough asking people to buy wreaths when I was in Boy Scouts and that was when the neighbors would have mercy and order something just because I showed up. Nowadays, there’s no way I could bring myself to do it, if for no other reason than I’d start getting major cramps in my back from leaning forward so much.

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Close encounters of the second kind

Wednesday, June 29, 2005. Los Angeles, California. Several hours after shooting the reunion show footage. A bar called “Barney’s Beanery.” The men’s restroom. “Hey, I really like your show.” (I guess the second time someone recognized me in public was creepier than the first…)

I could barely hear in the bar because it was karaoke night. There was someone working the “stage” to ensure that people were signed up and “sang” in order. Using the blaringly loud sound system, she told the crowd (after identifying me amongst them) that she thought I should win because I was a Boy Scout. Her brothers were once Cub Scouts and did the Pinewood Derby (according to her, half the kids’ parents built their cars in that Cub pack…). Oh yeah, and continuing to yell into the microphone, she added, “The tent challenge was bullshit.” Meaning she saw the episode in which I was kicked off. Meaning I was really confused… and my ears were on the verge of bleeding.

I also got to see everyone from the show again—it was a good night.