“March of the Penguins” is in theaters now and I imagine the documentary is based on scientific theories to explain why it’ll walk 70 miles to knock up another penguin or waddle around with its young ‘uns huddled between its nonexistent legs (which essentially means they’re buried in its crotch). But why bother with scientific theories? Why not just ask the birds themselves?
“Excuse me, Mr. Penguin, why are you waddling around with your young ‘uns buried in your crotch? Is it to protect them from the elements?”
“No, I do it because it’s really frickin’ cold out and I’m trying to keep my nuts warm!”