Tag: Michael Jackson

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Well, it’s not a typo, but…

After filling out an online survey about a product I recently purchased, the company offered me a free year’s subscription for up to four magazines on their list. It was pretty extensive and showed a recent cover for each one. There was Entertainment Weekly, Reader’s Digest, Entrepreneur… and then there was Ebony. “Wait a sec… Nah, that can’t be right.” So I clicked on the magazine and zoomed in on the cover. Sure enough, the person on the cover of Ebony was Michael Jackson.

I guess the article was about the 25 years after Thriller (back when he had slightly pigmented skin and some semblance of a nose), but seriously, is he still considered ebony at this point? Shouldn’t he just get his own color in the crayon box or something? Still, I guess that’s better than putting him on the cover of some of the others. Like Good Housekeeping. Or Kiplinger’s Personal Finance Magazine. Or FamilyFun. Yeah, parents would love that one…

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Michael Jackson Attacks Own Bodyguard

By Shawn Bakken, Staff Reporter

It seemed like just another ordinary day at Neverland, Michael Jackson’s ranch and amusement park. After cruising around on the quarter-mile go-kart track for twenty minutes, Jackson was walking toward the Ferris wheel until Bryce Handle, one of the bodyguards hovering around the grounds on a regular basis, said something quietly to another guard and turned to go into the main building. Jackson immediately attacked the 4-year veteran of his staff, leaving several scratches across Handle’s cheek. Shortly thereafter, Handle received a memo on official Disney stationary informing him of the immediate termination of his position in Jackson’s Magical Kingdom. In response, Handle is suing Jackson for $100 million. Continue reading “Michael Jackson Attacks Own Bodyguard”