I only care about certain weddings

The Royal Wedding of Prince William and Commoner Kate is not one of them.

Conversely, my little brother Justin married Molly Moilanen on this date three years ago. I talked to him on the phone earlier tonight and he was happy to report, “We made it over the two-year hump, so we should be good for another forty, fifty years.” I hope so for their sakes. Happy anniversary, guys.

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