One Word

I was bored tonight and opted to avoid doing anything productive with my time by surfing around on the Internet. Trust me, after years of practice, I’ve become pretty damn good at avoiding it. I ended up checking out Myspace and found yet another bulletin with a bunch of survey questions. This time, I decided to take it. I also decided to post the results here on the blog because, hey, why the hell not? It gives you all a chance to peek into the mind of little ol’ me (assuming that I’m little and that it’s actually me who’s writing this) and you might decide to take the survey on your own.

Mind you, I didn’t want to make this completely serious. If I was completely serious, I could end up making both of us cry by the end of the entry. Consequently, I’m writing two versions: one that’s sincere and one that’s not so sincere. If you can’t tell the difference… I might be the only one crying at the end.
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1. Where is your cell phone?
Pocket
Rectum

2. Boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse?
Casie
Twelve

3. Your hair?
Highlights
Palms

4. Work?
Frustrating
Welfare

5. Your father?
Healthy
Biological?

6. Your favorite thing?
Family
PORN!

7. Your dream last night?
Unsure
Foursome

8. Your favorite drink?
Gatorade
COFFEE-COFFEE-COFFEE-COFFEE!!!

9. What is your dream car?
Rolls
Herbie

10. The room you’re in?
Bedroom
Kennel

11. Pets?
None
Bunkmates

13. What do you want to be in 10 years?
Youthful
Superman

14. Where did you hang out last night?
Home
Tree

15. What are you not good at?
Motivation
Pooping

16. Eyebrow rings on the opposite sex?
Meh
Slobber

17. One of your wish list items?
Cash
PORN!

18. Where you grew up?
Lakeville
Uterus

19. The last thing you did?
Myspace
PORN!

20. What are you wearing?
Underthings
G-string

21. What aren’t you wearing?
Pants
Protection

22. Your computer?
Laptop
PORN!

23. Your life?
Satisfactory
Hasbro

24. Your mood?
Amused
Semi-jubilant

25. Missing?
Completeness
Thumbs?!

26. What are you thinking about right now?
Humor
Sasquatch

27. Your car?
Escort
Immobile

28. Your work?
Working
Nonexistent

29. Your summer?
Sunny
Rehab

30. Your relationship status?
Happy
Polygamous

31. Your favorite color?
Blue
Sasquatch

32. When is the last time you laughed?
Midnight
12:00

33. Last time you cried?
3rd?
12:01

34. School?
Law
Flunked