Head Case: The Fuzzy Years

I’ve been putting off writing this entry because, well, it makes me a tad uncomfortable to think about. I’ve alluded to it in previous posts in this category, but… framing this is harder than I thought it would be. Part of that might be because I don’t know exactly when it started and another part might be because some of what I’m writing is second-hand knowledge. Still, I’m pretty sure this chapter began in college.

I can’t be any more specific than that, really—I remember a few specific incidents, but I can’t distinguish any as “the first time it happened”. However, after “the first time it happened”, my family and I didn’t think it was epilepsy. We consulted a specialist who diagnosed the episodes as icepick migraine headaches. Oddly enough, they have the same symptoms… go figure.

So during this type of seizure, I’d feel a slight sense of vertigo. Not enough to prevent me from functioning, but enough to throw my system off (one time, I was playing a game of touch football and just subbed myself out when it started). Then I’d start seeing a movie in my head. It’d kinda like when you get a song in your head and you can start singing to it, but it was a scene in a movie that looked so familiar, but I couldn’t quite tell what movie it was. After a minute or two, the movie would go away, I’d usually start sweating a little and feel really tired.

What I discovered later was that along with the movie playing in my head, I couldn’t read. I could see words on a page, but my head wouldn’t put the words into sentences. They were ink on paper. Then the movie would dissipate, I’d feel hot and want to take a nap. I think it eventually reached a point where it would happen about every two months: three episodes during the course of the day and I’d usually sleep after each one.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch (home in Minnesota vs. college in Ohio), the guy who diagnosed me as having icepick migraines decided to retire. He didn’t want to leave me flopping around like a fish out of water—pun intended—so he referred me to (drum roll, please)… Minnesota Epilepsy Group. And they were the ones who eventually determined that, yes, I had epilepsy.

The most likely reason it happened was that my body slowly became acclimated to the dilantin. As time went by, the drug became less and less effective until I eventually started having little seizures. After I got past the state of little seizures… there are more stories for later entries.