I don’t feel any different than yesterday (aside from being woken up by my uncle singing “Happy Birthday” this morning), but something about round numbers is really appealing to people, I suppose. Plus the price of car insurance goes down when you turn 30. Yay 30!
So here’s a happy birthday story to let you all know how much of a party animal I am. At approximately 2:00pm, October 19th, 1976, I popped out of my mommy’s tummy. My first act was screaming my damn fool head off (though technically, it did remain attached to the rest of my body). My second act was to show my gratitude to the doctor for removing me from the warm and comfy place where I had been residing: I pissed all over him. My third act, just in case the doctor didn’t realize just how thankful I was, was to take a dump on his scrubs. Thus, my family quickly discovered that all three ends worked.
Now, 30 years later, I have a little more self-restraint. I’ve developed an indoor voice and I’m potty-trained (for the most part), so I found out that they’re still functioning properly this morning without as much fanfare. However, when my uncle came to my room singing “Happy Birthday” and tried to drag me out of bed, thus removing me from the warm and comfy place where I had been residing…
