Well, you’ll miss out.

And wouldn’t you know it, I did. Thankfully, they’ll be replaying the first episode of this season’s Beauty and the Geek again on Thursday, so you’ll have to wait until then for a vaguely amusing review based on what the editors show us plus my personal biases.

I think my reason for missing most of the show is legit: I was having dinner with some family members to celebrate my grandma’s 90th birthday. We decided to meet at 6:00, which meant I missed the last (retelevised) part of the USA v. Nigeria game in the Women’s World Cup; thankfully, the team won 1-0 without me and took the top seed in Group B. “USA! USA! USA!”

. . .

Anyway! Because the restaurant we went to was a buffet and I went back for thirds—salad, main course, ice cream… plus a few cookies and a breadstick for good measure—it took a while to finish and I got home with about 20 minutes of Beauty and the Geek remaining. Damn…

Aside from all that, happy 90th birthday, Grandma! Hope you can make it back for a second plate on your 100th, too.